Seeking His Presence Now: Laura
I am so grateful that Laura was willing to share the ways that the Lord is meeting her during this season of her life. If you know Laura and her husband, you know that they are full of God's Spirit and that His joy is evident in them.
1 Peter 1:4 says, "Let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious."
Laura embodies that verse. She has a peace about her, and she rests in the Lord in a way that makes her spirit gentle and quiet, at ease with herself and others. Laura ushers others into the presence of God--probably without even knowing it most of the time. Her strength is in her God, and He makes Himself known in and through her. Laura, thank you for sharing here. Thank you for your honesty and your vulnerability. Thank you for opening up your precious heart and letting us see the One you love and trust.
Laura's words are below.
For the past almost two years now my husband and I have been trying to have a child. I have learned a lot throughout this season, and a lot of things I wish I never had to find out about. The one thing that I keep clinging to is the Lord's constant faithfulness.
My testimony has always been one of trusting in God's complete faithfulness and steadfastness. By his grace alone I have been able to walk with him from a young age. He has always proved himself to be constant, and full of love.
When I think back about how I walked into this season it is strange to me. I really walked into it all knowing it might be a little harder for us to conceive because of some medical issues, but almost being a little naive on thinking how long it might actually take. I remember thinking oh as long as I am pregnant by the summer that will be fine....and the summer came and went, and so did the fall.
After trying for a while I decided to speak with my doctor, and then got caught up in a season where we were looking into different medical options. Trying to see what might be able to help me. I don't have a ton of opinions on all the different options because I think the Lord has plans for each of us. It is more important to seek him and his plans no matter what path you choose, but when we walked through that season of listening to the doctor I remember thinking to myself... am I trying to just handle this on my own, or am I seek the Lord for guidance.
Each month was such an emotional roller coaster trying, and waiting to see what would happen. Then after a family vacation this past August my husband and I set outside, and talked about what the Lord was showing us through this season. It was so clear to me that the Lord was reminding me, "I am faithful, and I have plans for your family." We decided it was time for us to be still about it all, and trust in Jesus. He was so gently with me, and told me to wait on him, and his plans. That at this time I didn't need to keep seeking outside help, but I just need to walk with him, and listen to his instructions.
About a month after that I went on a trip to the Middle East, and we worked with refugees. It was amazing to see how the Lord was protecting, and providing for these people. Again his faithfulness and steadfastness were so evident. It blew me away, but at the same time when I really thought about it I was not surprised because I know my God's character, and he is compassionate, loving, and good.
One day on a home visit this little girl came up to me, and set in my lap for the whole visit. She was a beautiful little girl and during that moment the Lord just pressed in my mind these words, "You will have a child someday...keep your hope and trust in me." How sweet and personal God is to his children.
When I returned from the trip I knew it was time to see if I was pregnant or not that month. I honestly get so exhausted taking the pregnancy tests each time, and I kept putting it off that week. Finally, one morning I decided to ask the Lord for something specific while I was praying. I asked him to make it very clear to me if I needed to take a test, and if not that it would be time for the next month to start again. Later that afternoon I got my answer that it would be another month of trying. Although I was sad when it happened and tears were definitely shed, I was also blown away by how sweet my Father was to me that day. He answered me in the very same day, and showed his love, goodness, and faithfulness. My faith, hope and trust was increased that day, but the amazing thing is that my God never changed...I knew he would answer me!
I know that one day we will receive the gift we are waiting on, and I will be out of this difficult season, but my prayer throughout the whole thing is that I would not have despair or doubt. The Lord has blessed me with the most amazing family and friends to walk this season with, but most importantly he has reinforced his character to me. My God is FAITHFUL, CONSTANT, STEADY, LOVING, COMPASSIONATE, MERCIFUL, and GOOD! I want to look back on this season, and say that because of his grace upon me I remained faithful to him, and I clung tightly to his promises and truth. He deserves all the glory and praise, and I pray that my story would give him just that. It is sweet to rest in his presence.
"Let me hear in the morning of your steadfast love, for in you I trust. Make me know the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul." Psalm 143:8